Pesky pets

Our pets drove me crazy last night/early this morning.

It started last night with Pouncer the Wondercat. A few minutes after we'd gone to bed I heard his little pads on the hardwood floor as he entered our bedroom. (God forbid we close the bedroom door again or he'd sit outside it and meow for hours.) I felt him hop up onto the bed, which is fine, and assumed he'd settle at the foot of the bed as he often does.

But for some reason, he kept walking around all over the bed. Each time he'd walk close to me it would pull the sheet taut over me and keep me from being able to fall asleep. Then he came up next to me and started licking my arm. I slid my arm under the sheet and he started licking my shoulder. I pulled the sheet up to my chin, leaving nothing exposed but my head, so he started licking my hair. (Licking humans shows affection.)

I spoke to him as I've done before, telling him it was time to go to sleep and to go lay down. For some reason he didn't want to, and instead kept walking around on the bed. Finally he settled down and I dosed off.

I don't know how much time passed, but I was awakened by Pouncer standing next to my shoulder purring loudly. I got kind of mad at him for waking me up so I scooped him up with one hand and lowered him onto the floor. But before I could drift off to sleep again I felt him hop back up onto the bed. This time he settled at the foot of the bed and I returned to slumberland.

Sometime later Jordan (the dog) woke me up with her nails tapping on the floor. Apparently she had an itch and as she scratched it her nails kept tapping on the wood floor. Then she shook her head back and forth, causing her metal ID and inoculation tags to jingle like jingle bells. Eventually I drifted off again.

Sometime later Jordan woke me up again when she sneezed several times.

As is the pattern, before Spouse left for work in the morning he let Jordan outside to pee. I normally get up about 1/2 hour later. After being outside this morning, Jordan came back upstairs to the bedroom with her nails tick-tick-ticking on the wood floor. Normally she lays down and doses until I've had my shower and we go downstairs together, but this morning she just kept walking around.

Into the bathroom with her nails tick-tick-ticking on the tile floor. Back into the bedroom with her nails tick-tick-ticking on the wood floor. Out into the hallway with her nails tick-tick-ticking on the wood floor. Back into the bedroom, back into the bathroom, back into the bedroom. It was as if she knew she was keeping me from sleeping and enjoyed every second of it!

I finally got so mad at her for keeping me awake I yelled at her "Get in your bed!" She did and the house returned to quiet, but it was too late. I was awake. I looked at the clock and decided to get up even though I should have been able to sleep a few more minutes.

So today I decided to pay her back by coughing and slamming drawers loudly to wake her up whenever I see her sleeping. Ha ha... that'll teach that b*tch who's boss!

Crush du Jour: Stephan Weiler