Random Acts of Kindness

I've written several times about how important I think random acts of kindness are.  Just click on the random acts of kindness tag on this post to read my thoughts and opportunities for doing this.  When you can do something nice for people who aren't expecting it, it makes them feel good AND you feel good.

So a recent opportunity I took advantage of was on Mother's Day.  After returning from spending the weekend in DC, we met up with Steven & Thad for dinner Sun evening at a restaurant we've frequented many times.  We had a waitress we've had several times who looks like Reese Witherspoon.  As we ordered our drinks Spouse casually asked the waitress if she was a mother.  She said yes, she has 2 kids, but that she hadn't seen either of them yet that day (it was after 5:00).  She seemed to become a little emotional, so to diffuse the situation I suggested "Well, you're working right now so maybe they'll be there waiting for you when you get home from work."  She smiled and said "Maybe so."

When it came time to pay our $23 bill, I added at $27 tip and wrote "Happy Mothers Day" and a smiley face on the bill.  While the money won't make up for (possibly) not seeing her kids on Mother's Day, hopefully she'll use the cash to treat herself to something.

Remember, random acts of kindness don't have to involve tipping or money!  They can be simple, thoughtful gestures like holding the door, allowing someone with fewer items than you to go ahead of you in the grocery store line, picking up a dropped item for someone rather than just telling them they dropped it - you're only limited by your own imagination.  

I challenge everyone to open yourself up to all the possible opportunities to do good, feel good, and help others feel good too.

 

Too much

Sun evening when Spouse & I were having pizza with Steve & Thad we had the most overly attentive, overly familiar, waitress in the world! She was really just too much.

She must have asked to refill our drinks a dozen times. Call me cynical, but if you're a waitress and you look at someone's glass and its still 3/4 full, why would you ask if they want a refill already? Its still 3/4 full!

Seemingly 10 minutes after we began to eat she asked us if we needed a take-home box. Um, no, we're still eating. After the 2nd time she asked if we need a take-home box, Steve said to us after she left our table "Look at us. Do we look like we don't finish our meals?"

She must have asked if we were "doing okay" 2 dozen times. I wanted to say "Yes, we're still doing okay. If we need anything we'll get your attention during one of the 8,000 times you pass our table", but instead I just smiled and said "Yes, thanks." Then she said "Okay, I just wanted to make sure." Make sure??? As if maybe we really don't know if we're doing fine?

Granted the restaurant was less than 1/2 occupied so she didn't have a lot of customers requiring her services. But that doesn't give her the right to harass people who are trying to eat and talk. It seemed like every time we'd get into a conversation about something she was there to interrupt with questions about refills and take-home boxes. I felt as if I needed to talk really fast so I could finish my statement before she returned.

The clincher is when she came to our table while we were talking about Whitney Houston's new album and how she doesn't sound the same due to all that screaming "Bobbaaaaaaayyy!!". Uninvited, the 17-year old (or so) waitress says to me "Aw, you shouldn't talk that way about me" and smiled.

I had no idea what she was referring to. I just looked at her for a minute, puzzled, and said "What? I wasn't talking about you." What I really meant was "I wasn't talking TO you."

Then she had the gull to say to me "Oh, you really are a true blond. I was just joking with you!" and walked away. I cocked my head to the side, blinked a few times, and said to my dinner companions "Oh, no she betta di'nt!!!"

Obviously, there were multiple things wrong with that:

1. I was having a conversation with my friends - NOT with you!
2. We were talking about Whitney Houston. Your name is Reina, so why would you think I was talking about you?
3. It is not funny when you interject a comment that is irrelevant into a conversation you were not invited to join.
4. It is not a "joke" when you basically call a customer a dumb blond.

The crazy part about it is that I really don't think she was trying to be a smart ass. I don't think she meant to be offensive or overly familiar. I really do think she was just young and unable to determine the correct level of interaction with her customers.

One thing is for sure: if she is our waitress again some day, I will have to find a polite way to tell her to back off or else she's not getting a tip!

Crush du Jour: Ben Bilic