Thursday, August 29, 2013

Jimmy James

Last night Joe P & I went to see a very talented voice impressionist, Jimmy James, at the Blue Moon.

The only other time I saw Jimmy James was in 2001 or 2002 when he provided entertainment at a PFLAG benefit dinner.  I thought he was hilarious and very talented, so when I saw that he would be doing a show at the Blue Moon, I was excited to be there.

Jimmy started his career by being one of the most famous and believable Marilyn Monroe impersonators.  He was on nearly every daytime talk show on TV in the 80s.  Later he began expanding into voice impersonation and able to do a wide range of amazing voice impressions.  Close your eyes and you'll think you're listening to the actual celebrities themselves!  And I'm amazed at how quickly he switches from diva's voice to the next.  Check this out!

Jimmy told an interesting story about some of the voice work he's done in the past.  He received a request from a gym/fitness club that caters to women, wanting him to record disco versions of all of Cher's songs to be used in their cardio room.  They thought he sounded that much like Cher, and I can understand why.
Me & Jimmy James
If you get a chance, go see Jimmy James!!

Monday, August 26, 2013

Disappointed with LOGO

For several years I have enjoyed the programming on the LOGO network, a cable station with GLBT-themed programming.  I enjoyed watching gay-themed films like "To Wong Fu: Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar", gay-themed original series like "Noah's Arc", and a gay-themed comedy show called "The Big Gay Sketch Show".  I always knew where to turn when I wanted a dose of gay in my entertainment.

But about a year ago or so, something changed, and not for the good.  In place of all that GLBT-themed entertainment, LOGO now runs series like "16 and Pregnant", "Teenage Mom", and "Roseann".

WTF???  I understand that MTV owns LOGO and those shows air on MTV, but why in the world would a network for GLBT people run programming about unwed teenage mothers???

Until a month ago the ONLY GLBT-themed show on this network was reruns of past seasons of "RuPaul's Drag Race".  As much as I enjoy watching that show, I don't need a 12-hour marathon of an entire season in 1 day.

Just recently LOGO has added "Will & Grace" reruns which is fun, but it doesn't make up for all the hours of programming geared toward MTV audiences. 

Where are the gay-themed films, original series, and comedy shows???

Indeed I am disappointed with LOGO

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Lovely lyrics

This is my tribute to beautiful, romantic, and lovely lyrics.

What Are You Doing the Rest of Your Life?
performed by The Real Group

What are you doing the rest of your life?
North and South and East and West of your life?
I have only one request of your life
That you spend it all with me.

All the seasons and the times of your days.
All the nickels and the dimes of your days.
Let the reasons and the rhymes of your days.
All begin and end with me.

I want to see your face in every kind of light,
In fields of gold and forests of the night.

And when you stand before the candles on a cake
Oh let me be the one to hear the silent wish you make.

Those tomorrows waiting deep in your eyes
In the world of love you keep in your eyes,
I'll awaken what's asleep in your eyes,
It may take a kiss or two..

Through all of my life..
Summer, Winter, Spring and Fall of my life,
All I ever will recall of my life
Is all of my life with you.

Monday, August 19, 2013

Darwin awards

Each year the Darwin awards posthumously commemorate those who improve the gene pool by removing themselves from it.  I am giddy to present you with the 2013 Darwin award winners:

8th Place
In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
7th Place
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally zoned when he ran", accidentally jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run!! 
6th Place
While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom, when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital!
5th Place
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.

4th Place
Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.

3rd Place
After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt.
Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2 A.M. So they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice that the window was closed!!!
Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more excited, and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge, they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.
Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded.  The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

New blog feature: Lovely lyrics

If you've been a reader of this blog for a while, you've seen my 28 Stoopid lyrics posts over the last 3+ years that expose songs with lyrics that don't make sense.  It was fun, but I'm done with that now.

So I'm starting a new blog feature called Lovely lyrics.  Its kinda the opposite of Stoopid lyrics because the songs I'll feature have beautiful, romantic, lovely lyrics.

For my 1st Lovely lyrics post I'm sharing a song I've loved for many years and sung at many auditions:

I've Got the World on a String
performed by Ella Fitzgerald

I've got the world on a string
I'm sitting on a rainbow
Got the string around my finger
What a world, what a life - I'm in love

I've got a song that I sing
I can make the rain go
Any time I move my finger
Lucky me, can't you see - I'm in love

Life is a beautiful thing
As long as I hold the string
I'd be a silly so-and-so
If I should ever let go

I've got the world on a string
I'm sitting on a rainbow
Got the string around my finger
What a world, what a life - I'm in love

Life is a beautiful thing
As long as I hold the string
I'd be a silly so-and-so
If I should ever let go

I've got the world on a string
I'm sitting on a rainbow
Got the string around my finger
What a world, what a life - I'm in love

Monday, August 12, 2013

Not Myself

I just finished reading "I Am Not Myself These Days: A Memoir". A friend recommended it with the guarantee that I would love it.  She was right.

The book is about Josh who struggles to function at his advertising job during the day because he spends his night getting drunk in gay nightclubs dressed in drag, often getting home just in time to change clothes and go to work.  Josh's alter ego Aqua is known for her costumes which feature clear "breasts" filled with water and live goldfish.  As if his life isn't odd/stressful enough, Josh/Aqua begins dating Jack who is a escort.

Despite the words "a memoir" in the title, I assumed the book was fiction due to Agua's over-the-top drinking and outrageous behavior.  At the end I realized it was indeed a memoir, and that the sometimes sad and often hilarious events in the book were true.  It was a fun read that I would recommend.  Order the paperback, hardback, or Kindle version from Amazon.

Another thing I didn't realize until after finishing the book was that its author, Josh Kilmer-Purcell, about whom the story revolves, is the same Josh Kilmer-Purcell who is one of the Fabulous Beakman Boys.  What a different life he leads now!

Thursday, August 08, 2013

The Judy Show

Last night my friend Joe P & I went to see Michael Holmes in "The Judy Show" at the Blue Moon.

This show is based on the successful 1960s TV series called "The Judy Garland Show".  Barbra Streisand's duet with Judy of "Happy Days Are Here Again/Get Happy" on this show in 1963 became a classic.  

Michael Holmes not only does an amazing job at singing/speaking like Judy Garland, he also impersonates several of Judy's guests from the famous TV series.  We were treated to visits from Bette Davis and Pearl Bailey who were hilarious!

The show isn't just singing, although Holmes is so good at it he could do a Judy concert.  But instead, he recreates the conversation with the audience and songs similar to the actual TV series.  

After the show Joe P & I hung around for a little while and got our pictures taken with Judy!
Joe P and Judy

Me and Judy

The show was VERY entertaining, and I encourage you to see "The Judy Show" if you can.  Check out the schedule here.

Monday, August 05, 2013


Recently I was showing homes to a new couple who asked to see a home they'd noticed in my company's newspaper ad.  (Our company has a weekly ads in our local paper.)  This particular home was in a town quite a distance from where I normally work so I printed out directions from mapquest to get us there.

Heading south we noted a huge traffic jam on the northbound side of the highway that appeared to be several miles long.  Knowing we'd have to return this way, I dreaded sitting in the traffic jam after having driven all that way to see the home.  

My mapquest directions worked just fine, and once we finally got to the home and looked around, I verbalized to my clients that I did not want to return the same way we came.  The trouble is, I had mapquest directions to get there and planned to use them in reverse to get home.  There is a huge bay in between where we currently were and where we needed to get back to, and since I was unfamiliar with the roads in this town, I was at a loss for how to get home.

Then it hit me:  the maps icon on my iPhone.  
 I pulled over in a safe place and tapped on the maps icon.  It showed me where I currently was and what roads were around me.  I pinched the screen to show more of the surrounding area until finally I saw a route that would take us around the west side of the huge bay and then back to my office.

It worked!  The maps feature saved me and my clients from sitting in traffic for who knows how long!  This feature alone was worth the price of the iPhone.

Friday, August 02, 2013


Why is it that when I'm shopping for a gift for a friend, I find all kinds of things for myself? And when I'm looking to 'treat' myself, I only find things that would make great gifts for others.

Or, when I'm looking for something specific for myself (ex: work clothes), I only find great flip flops or a terrific swimsuit.

Recently I was looking for a leather chair for our living room, but stumbled upon a terrific area rug that I fell in love with.  

Isn't this a fantastic rug??  The problem is, of course, I have no place for this rug.  It doesn't 'go' with the decor in any of our rooms and I'm not going to change all the furniture and linens in a room just to accommodate a new rug that I love but don't need.

I tried to get my friend Joe P to buy the rug since he is actually looking for a colorful rug for his breakfast room, but he said he wants a round rug.

I hope someone buys this rug soon so I don't have to keep seeing it and wrestling with myself not to buy it!