Hump day funnies

I'm in training all day today but I prepared this post in advance for your viewing and laughing pleasure.

Check out these actual newspaper clippings! Click on each to enlarge them.
I don't know about you, but I HATE having to put on my good sweatpants to go to the Walmart.

It may be a long shot, but you never know!

Wha???

"Used once only"??? For storing brains perhaps?

My guess is that this involves significant doses of controlled substances.

Hmm, I know a few that are really cheap!

EEEWWW!!!

That's the oldest trick in the police book!

Basically the duck said "Duck you!!"

I can understand why the parents would be nervous if it was Arnold as The Terminator.

Don't all of us have a crack in our behind?

No kidding! What next, donuts at the bakery???

Because its just so tempting without the reminder.

Shocking!

Typical governmental bureaucracy.

Ooooops.

Is that even possible?

What will the Feds say next? People need air?

I can't imagine what would have prompted a call about a "suspicious coin".

Pretty successful camo paint!

Really???

Next week the writer will be on "Are You Smarter Than a Third Grader?"

I would imagine so. Probably not a lot of teen pregnancy after age 20 either.

Not surprising. Lots of men do.

How do you decide?

Crush du Jour: Ryan Matthew White