tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post6945608000472977102..comments2024-01-09T23:23:38.038-05:00Comments on Tales of the Sissy: Long-term relationshipMark in DEhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12478832787656152843noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-57022622414354974872008-08-18T14:26:00.000-04:002008-08-18T14:26:00.000-04:00So much to respond to! Great post.I ended a five ...So much to respond to! Great post.<BR/><BR/>I ended a five year relationship because I didn't want to live the rest of my life the way I was, and I didn't think we'd ever find the common ground we both desired. Sex certainly became mediocre or non-existant, but I think that was a symptom as much as a cause.<BR/><BR/>My current relationship of just over a year, we have compatabilities (out of the bedroom) that I never even dared to put "on my list." There are always obsicles in any relationship, but theones we're finding seem very negotiableScothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06604642798064407780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-24397475625978813582008-08-18T11:58:00.000-04:002008-08-18T11:58:00.000-04:00I have 50 requirements, but would SO settle for a ...I have 50 requirements, but would SO settle for a guy meeting 40 of them!<BR/><BR/>80% is still a B, right?cbhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07012048318668422826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-4478701320410046332008-08-15T14:48:00.001-04:002008-08-15T14:48:00.001-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13885326688773256919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-64532981194376526922008-08-15T14:48:00.000-04:002008-08-15T14:48:00.000-04:00We've been together for almost 18 years and Brad a...We've been together for almost 18 years and Brad and I are very compatible, in many ways because we're so different. And the compatibility has grown over the years as we have grown and changed, as individuals and as a couple.<BR/><BR/>But sex. That would be a biggie for me. If that component wasn't there in the beginning, I doubt we would have gotten very far. If something were to happen now, a disability or an accident (god forbid), we would definitely still make it work and find ways around the problem. Happily, we continue to enjoy a toe-curlingly good sex life!Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13885326688773256919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-33626983609719878192008-08-15T10:04:00.000-04:002008-08-15T10:04:00.000-04:00Oh my...Something to think about- Now that it has ...Oh my...Something to think about- Now that it has been 11 years with the hubby..Well I would like to say we do have 5 out of 5 met..Just not all the time...sometimes we meet 3 out of the 5 for awhile and sometimes we a meeting 2 of of 5...and yes sometimes 5 out of 5. I dont believe in requirements like this.RADhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14327199086953530789noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-55048469822955194262008-08-15T00:14:00.000-04:002008-08-15T00:14:00.000-04:00I saw Matthew Montgomery in a truly bad film that ...I saw Matthew Montgomery in a truly bad film that I absolutely love called "Gone but Not Forgotten." I'd be interested to see this one, too. <BR/><BR/>As for 5 of 5, I have a further question. How long do you want the relationship to last? People change over time. Maybe your list of priorities will change. Maybe the sexy boy you're considering will change. Maybe these changes will take place over the course of 15 or 20 years or longer. Are you willing to put that much time and committment into a relationship? <BR/><BR/>Furthermore, if the sex is really smokin' now, but something should happen in 5 or 10 years to adversely affect one of the partners' ability to perform sexually, would you leave the relationship because the sex wasn't good anymore?<BR/><BR/>What if the sex is ok, or even pretty good most of the time, but not everything you hope for... then what? TMI true story: after 23 years of marriage my husband and I made some interesting discoveries (research, you know) and now our sex life is so much more intense, so much better than it ever was, even when we were young, hot and horny. Who would have thought? <BR/><BR/>I think we all assume that couples who have been together for years just don't have sex that often. I've heard stories, read surveys that support that assumption. But it oh so doesn't apply in our case, or in many long term relationships I'm aware of. <BR/><BR/>And there is so much more to a relationship than sex. But sex, for me anyway, is very important. So, in the final analysis (don't you hate that term?) I have no idea. I am glad I married my husband, though, even if he didn't meet all the requirements on some list.Javahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17377033663576614925noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-78242075938125499592008-08-14T23:13:00.000-04:002008-08-14T23:13:00.000-04:00I have always said, "There is no answer, there is ...I have always said, "There is no answer, there is only participation."<BR/><BR/>Someone, put that on a sampler pillow!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-67664056147227075232008-08-14T20:29:00.001-04:002008-08-14T20:29:00.001-04:00Mike Says is absoultely right. Every day is diffe...Mike Says is absoultely right. Every day is different. Every year different. And to point fingers and say "You shouldn't" is just not horribly realistic. There are plenty of hetero and homo relationships that go without sex for one reason or another. And many are still happier than little clams. Difficult to pass judgment until you've been there and done that.A Lewishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05066992019067893513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-38069464373133703072008-08-14T20:29:00.000-04:002008-08-14T20:29:00.000-04:00Mike Says is absoultely right. Every day is diffe...Mike Says is absoultely right. Every day is different. Every year different. And to point fingers and say "You shouldn't" is just not horribly realistic. There are plenty of hetero and homo relationships that go without sex for one reason or another. And many are still happier than little clams. Difficult to pass judgment until you've been there and done that.A Lewishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05066992019067893513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-41738496657854090532008-08-14T19:13:00.000-04:002008-08-14T19:13:00.000-04:00I see your point and I totally agree that the list...I see your point and I totally agree that the list of "He Must Have" for some people is something I truly don't understand.<BR/><BR/>That said, I rarely date anymore because I know what I want in a man and if I'm busy dating someone that I'm dating just for the sake of "dating," them I might miss the guy who fits me and my personality.<BR/><BR/>It's not physical because I find all men sexy and attractive - - all men. And it's not financial because I could care less. But after being dragged through the worst relationship I could possibly imagine, the first thing I want from a man is honesty. And that is an incredibly rare quality for some reason.<BR/><BR/>If you're honest, you're in. And if you make me laugh, we WILL get married. <BR/><BR/>Great post. Very thought provoking.Stephen R.https://www.blogger.com/profile/05119958421791710858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-81030017234428320162008-08-14T19:08:00.000-04:002008-08-14T19:08:00.000-04:00Thanks for the movie review.We'll have to check it...Thanks for the movie review.We'll have to check it out.The movie sounds alot like myself and the hubby.He is very liberalrepublician, I'm demacratic,he a planner,I'm a get up and just go person,he in polictics,I'm in the arts,he's cautious,I'm laid back,but everyone tells us that we balance each other out.While we do have lots of common intrests,we get along very well.Without going into personal stuff, we are even having the same amount of sport nookie we had the first month we met,and still together for almost eight years now.But we agree with mikesays 2 or 3 out of five isn't bad.A close friend of ours always requires five of five,but once had a very wonderful relationship for 4 years where he had 3 out of five things he looked for in men.One day he wanted out of the relationship to look for a man that had all the things he wanted.Now he says he regrets it everyday that he did that,because that now was the best relationship he ever had and now feels he'll never capture that feeling again.So the grass is not always greener on the other side.Me and my other half consider ourselves very lucky!<BR/>Take care-<BR/>MaddieMistress Maddiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02098940220513091207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9822653.post-19260310797912588362008-08-14T18:20:00.000-04:002008-08-14T18:20:00.000-04:00I'll be honest, if no one else is.Sometimes 2 out ...I'll be honest, if no one else is.<BR/><BR/>Sometimes 2 out of 5 is good enough.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com